My sister`s Laura Ashley Dress

“Maurice I am sure i have something better than that Laura Ashley dress”  (this is  for sarah who patiently waits for the next update  each day)  …at some point i found myself getting ready for a party …which sometimes needed me to dress as a woman … my sister obliged and offered  some of her clothes ….my mother who often got involved seemed slightly on edge …it turned out my sisters clothes suited me quite well and in fact  rather than looking like jack lemon  in” Some like it hot”  I was transfoming into quite a presentable  debutante …I think i even shaved my  chest ..I  had my own  tights ??? and a delicate pair of lace up boots …as far as my mother was concerned She did not want a third daughter  especially on a friday night ..desperately she attempted to make me less presentable ..her eyes raced in their sockets …the neighbours  would see a six foot three  lady man leaving our house ….equally she believed   also that  six foot three ladymen  dressed nicely  might not  come home …. it turned out that  no one noticed  or were to polite to notice  my  purple knuckled hands and knocked knees as i paid my bus  fare  heading into town ….. mother was equally concerned  for my welfare  when the evening  I decided it was necessary to leave the house as quasi modo …. with much use of papier mache  and  PVA  glue  i managed  to move my eyes and mouth to new places of my face….  just as my mother was looking for a straw  as i could hardly breathe let alone  drink (out for the night)  my younger brother arrived with a new girlfirend  to meet us for the first time …. I was in hall  rasping for air …hunched over ….my face still a bit wet …I offered  my hand and said ” hello ullllssss  myyyyyyyyyy  Naaaaaamme   issssh  Maoooorish ! ” mother shoved the straw into my new nostril   and   quickly ushered me  to the door  with the offer of a blanket for my head. It was some time before I was allowed meet the lady young ……

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About mauricewoconnell

Maurice OConnell is a Creative based in Cornwall concentrating on Writing and Unique theatrical appearances.. He continues to imagine a world twice as exciting and dangerous than it could possibly ever be View all posts by mauricewoconnell

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